Let's be honest about the terms kick-off, workshop, and relationship goals. They tend to have a corporate and not very romantic ring to them like it's a race. To say that success in a great life and relationship is something you plan for sounds both un-romantic and joyless.

The thing is that talking about and defining a vision for your life and relationship is very romantic. It is about sharing dreams and wishes on how to live your best life together and jointly enjoy the ride. It is about deliberately deciding where you want to go as time passes. The future will happen no matter what so you might as well steer it in the direction you want. And you have all the power in your hands to do so.

Life by design is next-level relationship goals

A common life vision unites and adds meaningfulness and purpose to your partnership. It can include where you want to live and what you want to do with your time, how you like your social life to look, and your vision of your health. They can also be about your guiding stars and how you act in life and your relationship.

Relationship goals, or couples goals are great and romantic ideas but can also be a bit rigid and difficult to use as your guides as life evolves. To avoid exhaustion and setting yourself up for failure (similar to New Year's resolutions) it can be smart to avoid detailed goal setting and stay with the vision and guiding stars. Much like a value-driving company, it will take you a long way while avoiding the feeling of micromanagement and the corporate way of checking boxes (unless you are a person who loves your Excel sheet - then go for it).

Proof and how do you see it?

Setting a vision for your relationship can be a way to redesign the operating system of a relationship. All couples have a set of standards, behaviors, and values that they use to give and receive love in their relationship. They exist whether they like it or not or have it written down or not.

To test this, think of a couple close to you and think of a scenario or a situation you were in this week. I am sure you have a good idea of how they would react in the same situation.

The magic is that this operating system is yours to define and yours to change whenever you want to. Once you know how to design your life and set a common vision and guiding stars, you will always have joint dreams and ways to enhance and grow your relationship. You do not have to “be stuck” in given roles or ways of doing things. Your direction, vision and guiding stars can be adapted over time and give you something to grow and develop together with.